‘Twas the night before Top Christmas, when all through the house.
not a creature was cheesing, not even Ptown.
The jet sweeps were run, all without care
because everyone’s scared to throw a pass in the air.
The Bowens were nestled all snug in their beds
while visions of platinum takeoff ran streaks in their heads;
While Danny in MAGA gear and Fin in his cap
Are arguing about suspensions in the ol’ CM-chat.
When in my DMs arose such a clatter
I sprang to my discord to see what’s was the matter
“Penn State HFA is OP, Auburn only throws only drags.”
“Force win Iowa, I wont play vs that lag.”
Then in the gen chat my eyes they stumble upon
The same three people and screenshots of Pokemon
Then, with list of QB rankings, and the daily Trump news.
I knew in a moment that it must be Juice.
More rapid than eagles his haters they came
and he whistled and shouted and called them by name;
Not Kyler, Not Jared, Josh Allen’s my goat.
Not Patrick, Not Jackson come playoffs he chokes.
And then in a twinkling I heard on the roof
Willie raging on twitch about a dropped pick or Two.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around.
Down the chimney Orange Punch came with a bound
He complained about Vance, and T24
Mad about home games, I guess he wants more.
A bundle of plat quick jump and five stars on his back.
And he looked like a Ultimate Team player just opening his pack.
The rest of the league, how they twinkled so merry.
Raiola throws picks, while it’s only screens in Miami.
LSU hates the portal, UCLA thinks you’re all mid
USC has more quarterbacks than Troy has kids.
Dakarai lost shifty cause Harpdaddy got greedy
Watch out for the 4×1, cause K1ng’s offense mad cheesy
Pitt is a trooper, shout out to Jake
VT hates the swerve but uses it, fake.
Shout out the Buffaloes, the under dog Digga.
Derek, and Volly, and Gruff are all quittas.
Remember last spring, the league almost dead
But CFB25 dropped, Top had nothing to dread
We worked hard to restore the league that was great
to something bigger and better, and for that I give thanks.
Then they heard him exclaim, after Vance happened well before 9.
“The Top Sports Book has been updated, please check out the new !lines”
